Please note: I wrote this a few weeks ago, so the timing appears off as the election is now over.
RJC has a different brain. I truly believe it is both a blessing and well, not a blessing.
It recently occurred to me that as I have been agonizing over this election, reading posts and articles and watching all sorts of news shows, RJC has absolutely no idea as to what an election is, that there is an election going on, or why it's important that there is an election going on. This started me thinking about her brain.
She is 24 years old but her world basically consists of the "here and now." What she can touch. What is comfortable. What she cares about and likes. She communicates on a basic level about concrete things and does not have an understanding of abstract concepts. Routine is extremely important as it helps her to make sense of her day. Her anxiety goes down considerably when I am around.
On the one hand, how nice is it to have no worries about the future. It would not occur to her to worry about what will happen when she is 30 or 40 or 50 - because that's not part of the "here and now" and much too abstract. Her worries are what we would consider to be small - when can she go back to the Cape Cod house she enjoyed or where is that specific Barney video she wants. She has no concerns about who will be the next President because the concept of a President simply does not exist. She does not worry about whether or not there is global warming, about poverty, drug and alcohol abuse, freedom of religion. Absolutely none of the issues that we have heard about over and over the past few months are part of her world. I have to say - that sounds pretty good.
BUT. When I really stop to think about how her brain works and the limited understanding she has of her surroundings, it makes me sad. How anxiety producing it must be to get through a day. To have limited options in how she spends her time. She can't hop in the car and drive to a movie like other young adults. She needs to wait until it is convenient for one of us to take her. She can't decide to take a "mental health day" or a vacation day and stay home from her Day Program because she just doesn't feel like going. She isn't able to live independently in an apartment, choosing her own furniture or deciding on a roommate. She is not going to plan a wedding, plan a honeymoon, dream of having children.
The world is ever changing therefore her anxiety is a constant. Will there be a new staff she will need to figure out? When there is a storm, will the electricity go out - and for how long (the gal has an amazing memory and you can bet she remembers the 10 days without electricity that we had). When she runs out of her favorite bagels will mom or dad go out and get them in time for her next breakfast. Every small thing we may not even think about has the potential to increase her anxiety.
So is her brain a blessing or not?
